Monday, January 03, 2005
Texas, O Texas!
What Yahoo!Travel has to say about my cities. It's good for a laugh.
Clearly whoever does the write-ups for Texas cities is biased against Houston.
HOUSTON is an ungainly beast of a city, confused by overdevelopment during the oil boom and then traumatized by the sudden slump of the early 1980s. It's a suffocating place, choking with traffic and high on humidity, yet for all this, its sheer energy, its relentless Texan pride, and above all its refusal to take itself totally seriously, give it a perverse appeal, while its well-endowed museums and rich nightlife mean there is always something to do. That Howard Hughes came from Houston makes absolute sense; eccentric, domineering and sordid, the millionaire typified all that makes the city intriguing.
Makes you want to visit straight away, huh? (The sad part is, some of it's not all that far from the truth, but even I am willing to give poor Houston more credit than that.)
There is no good reason why Houston exists at all; it was founded on a muddy mire in 1837 by two brothers from New York who hoped it would become the capital of the new Republic of Texas. For all their wild claims about its potential as a port, and its (imaginary) urban attractions, the more promising site of Austin was made capital in 1839. However, by then Houston had somehow established itself as a commercial center. Oil – discovered in 1901, and, like the city itself, unpredictable and heading for obsolescence – became the foundation, along with cotton and real estate, of vast private fortunes. Among the most famous of the philanthropists responsible for the development of downtown Houston was the cruelly named Ima Hogg. Her city improvement projects were largely cosmetic, however, and the contradictions of urban life are still writ large here, where abject poverty (not least among the blacks who migrated here from the rural South in the 1960s) coexists with ostentatious wealth.
Alas, Houston! Get-Rich-Quick Quagmire! Megalopolis of Obsolescence! City of Contradiction! Hated by all!
Now the highlights of Austin.
AUSTIN was only a tiny community on the verdant banks of the (Texas) Colorado River when Mirabeau B. Lamar, president of the Republic, suggested in 1839 that it would make a better capital than swampy and disease-ridden Houston.
See? Still picking on poor Houston. You Yahoo!Travel bullies!
Early building had to be done under armed guard, as angry Comanche watched from the surrounding hills, but despite its perilous location, the city thrived.
These days it wears its status as capital of Texas very lightly; sightseeing rates as a low priority against simply hanging out.
True. Austin, Capital of Lazy Bums!
Since the 1960s, this laid-back and progressive city has been a haven for artists, musicians and writers.
Yes, that's why half of my art professors are embarrassed to be here at UT instead of somewhere like CalArts or Columbia. That's why we have to fight to get funding in our department. Because our art scene is thriving, man.
Austin is one of the few cities in the state where cycling is a viable alternative to driving.
Yes, that explains why we have some of the worst traffic congestion in the state.
It may not have completely avoided the usual problems of urban growth – thanks to a sizeable population leap, ugly suburbs have shot up to threaten its small-town ambience – but it feels wonderfully safe for visitors, even women traveling alone
*dies* You hear that? Even women travelling alone can feel safe in our glorious city. God bless you, Austin!!
and the presence of the vast UT campus adds to the atmosphere, even if almost every shop and streetlamp is adorned with the unsightly brown and white colors of the college's Longhorns football team.
Unsightly ORANGE and white colours, fool. Come on, at least criticise the right colour scheme.
| 1:04 AM |
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